This weekend, Joseph and I celebrated a wonderful six months of marriage. Yes, we are that couple that celebrates over ever single month, but hey, celebrating is fun, so we do it with gusto! We went to P.F. Changs and loved it WAY TOO MUCH and then went up to Anniversary Inn. Quick shout out to them, they may be on the pricier side of things, but it's always worth it. Spent the night in a covered wagon with cheese cake, watching Oblivion. And it was just wonderful.
I suppose at six months, I'd like to write a little thing about marriage so far.
At six months, I in no way consider myself an expert. I look forward to the day that I can call myself an expert, but that'll be several forevers down the road.
I guess I don't really know what to say about it. Just that I've grown more in the last few months than I ever have in my entire life. I've learned how to commute like a grown up. I've learned how to work like it meant something, because it does mean something, because every day of work is a week of food, and every week of food is so much rent, and it counts now. I've learned how to budget and how to save. I've learned that a clean house doesn't just mean something fancy to show guests, at times it comes down to whether or not you feel sane that day, depending on the state of your kitchen sink, and so maybe Netflix isn't important tonight, maybe dishes are important. That's not every something I'd say before. I've learned that sometimes I need to swallow my opinions on politics, or my opinions on what we should have for dinner that week, because sometimes it just isn't important. Most of the time, there's things that are more important. I've learned that to me, making my husband laugh, lifting him when he's burdened, and loving him no matter what is more important to me than anything at all. Most of all, I've learned a way to love that I could have never imagined. I love my husband. Interestingly enough, marriage has been teaching me to love me as well. Maybe more on that another time, right now mostly I love my husband and the blessing and strength he is in my life. The trust I place in him. The faith I have for him. The love I feel for him. And sometimes he can frustrate me and sometimes he makes me roll my eyes and sometimes I want to go to my own room, shut my own door, bury my head in my own pillow, and scream like no one can hear me.
But those times are nothing, statistically nothing in comparison to the number of times that I want to wrap my arms around his neck and kiss his cheek and look at his eyes when he's not looking my way and close my eyes and listen to his words because they're amazing and strong and lovely.
I'm 21 years old. I got married when I was 20. That's young. I will be the very first to say that I got married at a young age. When 20 rolled around and I was dating that boy, I felt so old, so ready for life, so sure of everything. And not to say that I'm not sure of everything now, just to say that it would be interesting to see how things would have been were I to have a couple more years under my belt.
Yes. I'm a young one. But the six months of experience I've gotten, being married to this man, has turned me into a much older 21 year old that I would have been, were I to be going it solo. I'm grateful for Joe. I'm grateful for every trial, every challenge, every tear that has been shed along this path. I'm grateful for every laugh. Every kiss. Every note in a lunch box. Every hug at the train station. Every text through the day. Every meal he has made. Every toe on his foot and hair on his head and every finger that he wraps in my fingers.
If the first six months are any indication of the next eternity, then I say bring it on, because it's been one heck of adventure so far, and I love it. However, the likelihood of the rest of our forever matching our first six months is very slim. Challenges are sure to come. Pains are sure to be had. Joys are sure to be felt. Experiences that I can't even begin to imagine are maybe only a few days away. But I can say with 100% confidence that we can make it. That Joseph and I are in it for the long run. After the last few months, it's nigh impossible to imagine a life worth having were he not to be a part of it.
I'm grateful for this man who is my team, and I'm grateful for our first six months.