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12.17.2010

Gwumpy Giws.

AH! I'm grumpy. I want to talk about how I'm grumpy.

I'm grumpy at people who have long hair. Especially if they sit in front of me in any situation. Because they always find it really awesome to floof their long hair all over me. It floofs! And it gets on my book and on my bags and on my knees and it makes me grumpy! Stop floofing your long hair all over me! Thanks!

I'm grumpy at peanut butter. I have never been able to satisfy peanut butter cravings. Because peanut butter is dumb! I'm all "Yeah. I want peanut butter!" And so I eat some. And it fills me up with just one teaspoon but I STILL WANT MORE PEANUT BUTTER! What the heck peanut butter?! What the heck!!!

I'm grumpy at smiley faces that face the other way. Call me silly but... a smiley face is supposed to have the colon first. Like this --> :)
THIS is NOT how smiley faces go (:
Do you know how you can tell? Have you ever tried chatting, and you typed a smiley face like that? Does it ever flip around and become a big happy yellow smiley face-NO! Because it's not a real smiley face! That's right! I went there and I bought property.

I'M GRUMPY AT PEOPLE WHO TYPE IN ALL CAPS. IT'S OK IF YOU DO IT HERE AND THERE TO EMPHASIZE A WORD, BUT IF YOU TYPE IN ALL CAPS IT MAKES EVERY WORD IN YOUR HEAD REALLY REALLY LOUD AND CAN GIVE YOU A HEADACHE. OR MENINGITIS. IT TAKES MUCH LONGER TO READ AS WELL. STOP TYPING IN ALL CAPS ALL THE TIME. PLEASE?!


I'm grumpy at websites that have video ads on them. So here I am trying to watch something and I hear a little voice in the background. And my brain starts going crazy shouting at the computer "What?! WHAT?! What are you saying little voice?! I can't hear you! SPEAK UP!" And then I realize that the voice isn't on the video I'm trying to watch at all! It's a video ad! So then I have to find what page it's on, find some way to mute it, and then I have to go back and watch the video over again so I can understand what's going on.

I'm grumpy that when I twist myself into really weird shapes my bra feels uncomfortable. Not cool bra. Not cool.

I'm grumpy that my pinky toenails are so unsightly. I'm grumpy that my big toenails are fat. I like toenails that are slender, you know? Mine are fat. And I can't exactly make them go on a diet.

I'm grumpy of instant judgments. I'm grumpy that people do it. I'm grumpy most of all that I do it.

I'm grumpy of the new facebook chat sound, because it sounds a lot like the gmail chat sound.

I've come to the conclusion that I'm grumpy that the sun is gone. Which is bunk, because I adore weather where the clouds are draping the mountains and the air is wet, and there's a promise of rain and beautiful scenery. But for some reason when the sun leaves me I just get grumpy. I needs me some artificial sunlight lightbulbs.

Get me some as you will.

3 comments:

Yo said...

Those are all reasonable things to be grumpy about! If you ever need to be grumpy and chat about it.. let me know. The caps thing and smiley face thing are so true! That's funny you included those. I am grumpy about them too! And I didn't realize it but it IS harder to read all caps. Hope you get un-grumpy soon.

Kellie said...

Number one. THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME A HEADACHE! And number two, I hate the upside down smileys. They bug me to no end.

chip said...

http://www.lampinfo.com/sunlight-lamps.php

Enough said.