8.07.2013

Poolside Manners

Last field trip today! We went to the pool. This was the third time going, it was pretty swell. I've gotta say, it's my favorite field trip. I just sit by the pool the whole time and work on my tan that never happens. Sometimes I burn. Sometimes I end up paler than before. I think the sun sucks the life out of my skin or something.... and along with that, the color. And sometimes my skin sparkles and I feel like I should eat people or bears and play baseball in a thunderstorm. It's weird, like... I don't get it.

Going to the pool has been doing wonders for my self esteem! I usually don't have a very good set of that, meaning, self esteem. Not great. Not an attribute of mine. But the pool helps, strangely enough. You'd think watching people walk around in itsy bitsy teenie weenie bikinis sans polka dots would cause me to look at my body and sigh, wondering why dreaming of going to the gym doesn't actually work me out... but it doesn't. I think that's because no one really looks good in a swimming suit. I saw a great deal of two ends of the spectrum today. The people who were so large you couldn't tell if they were even wearing a swimming suit, on account of the rolls of skin hiding any semblance of clothing, and the other end where it looked like the slenderman was walking around. Right down to the face-less face. I guess they had a face, but it was so sunken and deprived of life, you couldn't really tell if it was there or not.

I don't get in the pool, in case you didn't know that. There's poison in the water that you drink! It's a jungle out there! Hmm. It's poison for me, in any case. Burns my skin. I guess it's a rash, but it's more posh to say burns, and makes people freak out more. And the rash is so intense and encompassing that it looks more like a burn, and feels more like one too.

One time I got splashed near the corner of my eye, and the droplet of water left a scar. That seems a bit extreme, even I thought my body was overreacting, but c'est la vie. That doesn't happen every time. Heck, maybe now I'm completely fine, and could tolerate a swimming pool, but I don't have the guts to find out. Or the money for medical bills that would be sure to follow.

Anyways. Last day at the pool. I wondered what kinda mom I'll be. I can't take my kids to the pool, I don't feel ok throwing them into the water and not being able to get them if I needed to. Maybe Joe could take them some day. Maybe I'll pawn them off onto some other parents for a day or two. Maybe in the future, swimming pools will have no chlorine in it, and instead be filled with raspberry jam.

I guess one can dream.

2 comments:

Linda Hoffman said...

a lot of pools now are salt water..that is a lot like jam

Kellie said...

Salt water pools actually turn the water into the same chemical reaction that chlorine does. Lara went swimming in a salt water pool once, and it did the same thing to her skin.