I attend the University of Utah. It rocks. When I was little, I got the University of Utah confused with Utah State University. It's understandable, right? The both start and end with 'University' and 'Utah'.
The similarity doesn't end there. Both schools have really obscure mascots. Aggies. What the fetch is an Aggie? Agriculturalists, ok. That doesn't help much. It's hard to root for a mascot that is a farmer. I guess a cow is better but really. A cow.
My school's mascot is a Ute. It seems like that's sorta loosely defined. At games the mascot is a hawk. Pretty cool right? But it's not a Ute. I know that a Ute is an Indian... but I want to go deeper than that!
So I turn to the school's fight song in hopes of finding out what a Ute is. In hopes of finding out what our TRUE mascot is.
This doesn't always help, going to the fight song. A lot of good it does for the Ogden High fight song...
"Ogden will shine tonight, Ogden will shine!"
Oh ok. Ogden is one of those little glowy stars you stick on ceilings.
No maybe the Utah fight song will help more! There are lines in it that specifically say what we are!
"I am a Utah MANCER and I live across the green!... A Utah MANCER and will be till I die! (Ki-yi!)"
That's what I hear, I kid you not. What is a mancer? Let's compile a list!
Maybe they're just saying it wrong? Maybe they mean...
Cancer? We're all born in late June early July! WHOO!!!
Answer! That makes sense sorta. Like... we're the answer to Utah... We'll solve the... prob..lems... (still doesn't work.)
I'm tired of rhyming. Play a game of wits with me and poison me with a poison you've built up an immunity to as you wish. I mean will. As you will.